My name is Brian Holtz I grew up in the west suburbs of Chicago I come from a family that has always given me a lot of love and support. They did everything in their power to give me the best life possible.
Growing up I was always considered the black sheep of my family. I was too often influenced by negativity and attracted to the darker side of life, even into my adult years.
I began using marijuana and cocaine at the age of 13; shortly after I began using LSD and mushrooms. By the time I was 18 years old I had been to four different rehab programs, county jail numerous times, and was on the way to prison for the first time. I had also added PCP and crack cocaine to the list of drugs I was using. My drug use had increased dramatically and there was no more fun to be had using drugs. I now had a full blown drug addiction on my hands!
From the age of 18 to 33 years old I had been saved and came to know Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, to no avail. I later became comfortable living in sin. God and Bible were put on the back burner. This meant that I did things my way; that is until I found myself in a situation where He was needed and I would pray to Him. This was otherwise known as a foxhole prayer!
Even after that fact my drug usage continued. Of course I added more to the list such as ecstasy, special K, heroin, oxycontin and other pharmaceutical drugs. I’ve been to prison 3 times, survived 2 fatal overdoses, and I even attempted suicide twice.
After my last encounter with overdosing I was so far gone in my addiction and so mentally sick that on my way out the door of the hospital I was asking about the dope that I had in my pocket when I came in. After almost dying from an overdose my first thought was to figure out how I could get high again. I continued to use after that.
Soon after that I found myself up for five days using out of control. I ended up getting arrested on March 25th, 2007 with a large amount of cocaine and heroin. I ended up going to prison for 8 years; serving 3.5 years.
I had lost everything dear to me. My family would no longer talk to me. I was completely broken spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically.
I am a firm believer that God uses bad circumstances for good purposes. One of the many things that I realized as I sat in the holding cell on that Sunday morning was; God had truly rescued me from myself. I was going to expire from life due to another overdose that morning. I realized that those doctors didn’t revive me from those overdoses; I was made alive because Jesus Christ has a calling on my life. I thank Him daily for a second chance at life.
I may have lost everything through my addiction and going to prison; but that’s what it took for God to get my attention. He had to get me to completely surrender my life to Him and make Jesus the Lord of my life. To me, that’s gaining everything. Today I truly know what it means to be free and at peace. When I was in my madness I thought the only way I would ever be free from addiction was through death. All of a sudden Jesus came to live within me and truly delivered me from the bondage of all addiction. He also removed the desires from my heart that hindered me from a close personal relationship with Him. Jesus Christ took me out of a place that I never thought I could ever get out of, and He took me to a place I could never fathom. My way never worked for me. It has only caused my family and I pain, misery, and destruction. My way has failed me every time. God will never fail us and today I trust Him to direct and guide my every step.
Today God has restored my family to me. He has directed me to a church with beautiful brothers and sisters in Christ. They love and support me as the body of Christ is called to do. He put a call on my heart for a ministry in which I could reach out to all of you and now He has made that real for me. There is one thing I know; If God calls you to do something He will provide the means for it to happen.
There’s nothing that I do on my own strength. Everything I do is through Christ living and working in me. All I do is stand firm on His word and walk in His total victory. All glory be to Christ Jesus the everlasting King!
Trust me brothers and sisters; this is truly life or death for me. Today I choose the way, the Truth, and the Life which is Jesus Christ. Believe me, if He will help a nobody like me He will do the same for you.
I truly pray today that if you don’t know Him that you’ll please call on Him now. By doing this it allows you to be saved and for Him to come and live within your heart. It’s the best decision that you can ever make for yourself. You don’t have to live as I did for all those years. There’s no life in it; but there is life in Christ Jesus. Remember; if God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.
God bless you Real Men Love Jesus